I made a doodle yesterday as I listened to semi-smart people think they were smarter than they were (completely unrelated). See if you can figure it out before I tell you!

Can you figure it out? How about if I give you another?
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Depth of field isn't even an option

A PHP+GD image generator I created in 2008 was pulled out of the closet and given a [much,much, much] bigger canvas to work with. Pretty fun result. The image is 16,000 pixels squared, about 28MBs in size. It takes about 300MB of RAM for ~30 seconds of processing. The result is quite visually stunning!

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Today, Steve Jobs released an interesting essay justifying Apple’s shut-out of flash in the iPad and iPhone market. Apparently, when you make your first jog toward the light at the end of the tunnel, you’re imbued with a natural inclination to blog more. Maybe I need one of my organs to fail? Anyways, my summary of the high points:

1. Open – Flash isn’t an open system, it’s closed source and Flash controlled.
2. Features – All those flash sites you claim are so important? Yeah, we’ve got apps for those…so shut it.
3. Security – Adobe has more bugs than a camel’s armpit, and twice as many security flaws.
4. Power Consumption – Because you don’t use hardware acceleration it winds up sucking more processor speed, and therefore power.
5. Touch – Have you ever used an iPhone? Yeah, we like touch.
6. Flash Apps – Yeah, we’re not going to let you get that foothold. You know how we do quality control. [BAN]

It’s largely concrete and controlled, but my favorite quote is the last paragraph where he unleashes the liver-fed lion:

New open standards created in the mobile era, such as HTML5, will win on mobile devices (and PCs too). Perhaps Adobe should focus more on creating great HTML5 tools for the future, and less on criticizing Apple for leaving the past behind.

I largely agree with everything that Jobs is saying here, with one giant caveat: he shouldn’t have said it. Thousands of other people can say things like this and have it actually mean it, hell….even Ballmer would have gotten some respect from me for this kind of publication. But it wasn’t Ballmer, it wasn’t Zuckerberg, it wasn’t Brin, and it wasn’t even Bezos…it was Jobs.

Apple[Jobs] has created one of, if not the, most closed environments in recent history, barring the PRC. Every developer who wants to play in their app space needs to obey the censors and keep their noses clean, in addition to paying annual fees to enter the market. They continue to be criticized over, over, and over again for their blaze approach to censorship; Jobs even went so far as to tarnish the character of those who dare buy from the enemy. To say these things may seem like a logical attempt to regain trust from developers that “Steve’s really got our backs”, but it doesn’t take a psychology degree to see what his intentions are.

Jobs does not have the user or developers in mind. He’s pushed his teams to exclude flash from the iPlatform because he doesn’t want to lose control of the AppStore reigns. In a nearly-open system one can make the case that singular exclusions of technological compatibility are in the best interest of the consumer. Even Hu Jintao doesn’t whitelist Internet sites for his people. This essay has done nothing but push me closer toward a Verizon store and my first Android phone. I might even buy one of those wacky, now-imaginary Couriers.

Amazing, Steve, just amazing.

When running the course of my undergrad, I thought I’d lock onto programming and do it for years and years. I knew I had the impulse to lead and direct, but I never imagined myself doing anything more than being a “programmer lead”. Heck, I wasn’t the only one. Most of my friends knew that I’d be slinging code for the better part of five years. I couldn’t imagine a world without intelli-sense or Eclipse, and solving problems without a compiler was simply impossible.

The first lecture of my master’s program was my first policy/engineering class, and my world was rocked. I was probably galvanized by the seething hatred that my peers seemed to have for this brand of security. Dismissing the pariah complex, I had an abnormal draw toward it, and the people that I began to associate with only pushed me further in that direction. When I chose my first full-time position it was pretty clear where I would lean. Now I’ve programmed less than 100 lines of code in the last 3 months, and 95 of those were from personal projects.

Work is filled with partial glimpses into projects large enough to crush a human, and everyone struggles just to make sure their documentation doesn’t accidentally expand their scope commitment into a new circle of requirements-hell. Most of the higher-level minds just try to negotiate the nether-space between clients and managers, hoping that satisfying one of them doesn’t piss the other one off. Quality engineers are overworked, and project managers mumble unintelligibly to themselves while walking the fine line between hyper-tension and deadline slippage. Great ideas are hatched in unreserved conference rooms and laughed off or, if particularly reasonable, are stabbed to death by managers and customers during powerpoint briefings. The only people who get great things done are the ones who play the field better than Kasparov.

And it’s all fascinating.

This is one of those seemingly simple concepts that never really gets elaborated. Usually a student learning Java for the first time is told. “Write the following:”
public class Person
{
public static void main(String[] args)
{
System.out.println("Hello World!");
}
}
“Don’t ask why, just do it.” Because of that, I’ve heard this question more than a few times in the last couple years.
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If you found this site via some sort of Google search, you’re probably looking for answers. I won’t get to that now, but I will warn you that I don’t have them. If you’re a friend or colleague of mine you will have let out at bit of a laugh and settled into your chair with every intent of hating what I’m about to write. Well, I’m glad.

In industrial technology applications we often see projects and ideas labelled with ideas that spark value to other techies.  Terms like ‘robust”, ‘quality’, ‘efficient’, and, to a lesser degree, ‘boffo’. Far less often do we see technology simply described in terms of ease of use.  In fact, I would say it’s downright rare to hear of any steam-powered, hard-left engineers bringing up usability or learning curve when drafting a system designs or applications. Just like football players are interested in beer chugging and cheerleaders, I guess engineers into database normalization and load-balancers.

So what happens when you take that out of the equation? What happens when you take away the pomp and circumstance, when you lose the beer and the cheerleaders? Well, then you have football  or,  in this case, engineering. Take away the sex appeal of massive, scalable availability and mind-boggling complexity; what are you left with? It’s not frequent, sure, but it happens eventually. You’ve got problem solving, pure and simple. Simple calculations, exercises, tasks, and duties.  Sometimes football players have practice, they run drills, lift weights, and sell pizza coupons. Well it’s no different for engineers.

Enter Microsoft Access.

I’m serious, although this is quite a leap (move with me here, I’m trying to keep this short). Access has never, in its entire existence as a RDBMS, won any championship football games, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a great tool. It’s the football practice dummy and the barbell and the coupon book, but all of this for engineers. Just like them, we’ve got to do the boss’ laundry and earn our keep. We architect the big solutions, sure, but what about the little stuff? What about the parts inventory for the warehouse? What about the customer contact that the boss does once a week and notes in his journal? There’s also that email list that you share information on, but people keep asking the same questions every year or so and nobody keeps any of the information recorded anywhere? What about office supply orders that Debbie does once a week? It’s all little stuff.

Three times, in three different positions, I’ve used Access (or other simple data management tools) to bridge a gap or improve a process that was being done poorly or not-at-all.  Each of these times it’s been a task that I volunteered for, and each time I’ve received more recognition than all of my ‘big picture’ work combined. I didn’t choose Access because it’s fast or robust or sexy (as it is clearly none of these things), but it is definitely quick and easy and portable, not to mention the availability across most corporate IT spaces. It’s not designed to track Walmart’s inventory, but it does get the job done.  After all, who cares about an 18% performance increase on the security log queries when I have this nifty iPhone app that lets me keep track of what I eat every day? Okay, maybe that’s silly, but it’s all little stuff. And the reason it makes a difference is because it effects people.

I’m a proud Access developer. It’s not my day job, and I’m glad for that, but it’s an amazing tool. I pledge to volunteer my services to help improve the processes and daily work of people on whom I rely. I’m also going to use it as a ‘gateway database’; I’ll use it to get into American homes and get kids and adults to try harder stuff like MySQL, Linq, Rails, and Hibernate. But for Dad’s big list of home electronic serial numbers, Timmy’s baseball card collection, and small project CRM…well, I’m on board. Who knows? Maybe even the Microsoft or the EPA will use it.

*Remember: a good developer is an active developer. Please stop engineering for engineering’s sake; it’s not healthy. Put your skills to some good use and fix something or teach someone (or vice-versa).

Sometimes it’s good to have a moment of reflection and take stock of your position in life. I’ve heard that it is when you are at your busiest moments when you need to stop, if only for a moment, and consider all the things in your life. Well, I’m busy. Too busy, in fact, to look at all the things in my life, so I’ll just hit a few of recent technology moves that I’ve made. (Read on…)

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Subtitle: Makes an A$$ Out of You and Me

I ran into an issue last night with MySQL Workbench that frustrated me. I’m working with a table of medium-low complexity (about 10 Tables and 15 foreign keys) that I’ve inherited in joining a research team.  At this point I’ve reworked the whole thing to be a little more robust, but when I did so I ran into some problems on importing the results into a table.

On some of the tables I was getting an “Can’t create table <x> (errno: 150)”, which turns out to be a foreign key(FK) creation failure. I then realized that all of the tables that were failing were referencing the same core table, but with no visible issues. The primary key on the table was a composite of two  surrogate keys [INT(10) in this case]: one from the parent table and a local one.

I immediately thought that the FK definitions might have been incompatible, and so I combed through some of them for reasons why this would happen. I looked through InnoDB reference documentation in search of limitations in the implementation. Maybe there was a limitation on the number of keys referencing a single table, or on chaining “cascade”, “set null”, “restrict” behaviors, or on the maximum length for foreign key field names. Nothing.

I was up until 2 in the morning in the office last night with this problem with no success and eyelids with exponential density growth. When I got in today I quickly realized that it was just a simple conflict between ‘unsigned’ and normal int values in the foreign keys and relating tables.

My beef: All of the table declarations were made in MySQL workbench. Relationships and everything were formed using the exact same tools for all of it, and yet some of my columns were unsigned and some were not. Additionally, there was seemingly no way to change this value in the interface. Well, it turns out there is.

How to enable zerofill, unsigned, and other flags in MySQL Workbench:

• Go to (Menubar)->Tools->Options
• Open the ‘Diagram’ Tab
• Ensure “Show Table Column Flags” is checked

My biggest beef: A good programmer should never assume that a tool is doing what he wants it to do. If there’s no visible indication that numbers are being given unsigned classification, then that’s your job.  I wasted a few hours on this problem, but my jedi masters should be pleased that I’ve resolved this error in less than 24 hours. PEBKAC ftw.

I was recently visited by a friend who is also an IT professional. Some time during the visit, I casually made the recommendation that programmers should take a drafting course. I was a bit surprised to receive a contradictory opinion, but it was well received and has forced me to further justify my position in my own mind.

My case is rather simple; (more…)

Has this ever happened to you?

Hey, I have this thing you have to see! I’ll send ti via email, it’s 10MBs.
No wait, my email service can’t handle anything that size. It’ll have to go a different way.
Okay, I’ll send it over the IM client. Wait, it says you’re using a different client than me.
Yeah, I’m using Pidgin (read: stupid Pidgin, seeming all helpful)
Okay, log into Skype and I’ll send it as a file.
Okay. Wait why is it only going at 500 bytes a second?!?!? Are you running Windows 3.2? (read: or Linux, har har, but seriously why do Skype file transfers blow?)
Man, I’m going to have to upload it to my FTP server and send you a link. It’ll be faster. Click, click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,click,clickity-clickity-click. Okay, here’s the link.
Man…..that sucked so bad.

I can imagine you, the reader, sitting in your seat and sobbing into a pillow at this point, “Yes, yes I was there….I had to send him a burnnn….a burrnnn…a burned cd!!!” Well, maybe it wasn’t that bad.

So in my own way I fixed it for myself. ShareItNow is a python script that you drag files onto and it will automatically upload said files to the FTP site of your choice and give you a URL to give to your friends and family. It’s simple, but it’s not bad. You do need Python, an FTP server, and a Webserver, but that’s what I have so too bad if you don’t.

Just edit the script to change the value of your server location, credentials, and a web folder the server points to and you will be golden. Once you drag a file or files onto the script it will ask you if each file is binary before uploading. Once it’s done with an upload it will print you a URL that you can use and go on to repeat the process for any additional files.

One last thing, to make Python scripts “Droppable” (meaning you can drag-and-drop a file onto a script to get some magical result) you need to enable a little switch in the registry. I added a .reg file to the project zip using the code in a tutorial on how to make droppable Pyscripts. The funny thing is that this guy wanted to do the same thing I did, but he didn’t share his code. Great minds think alike, I guess.

But I share my code  (Download ShareItNow)   ;D

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